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This web page is dedicated to the Generation Y (2-30 year old young adults). Life is about choices and today's world offers more choices than at any other time in history. Which choices you make now as a young adult will determine what kind of life you will have in your future. 

It is our hope that you will make wise choices - and that this website will play a part in that process.

Ken N.


There exists within most societies, transcending all genders, nationalities, races and religions, a small percentage of people that adhere to what is known as "core values". These values were historically instilled in us as children by our parents, churches and schools. But in much of today's society, those values have been tragically lost.

Below is a list of the six core ethical values that will give you the character to live a truly happy and fulfilling life. By adhering to these values, you will find that others of like mind and standards will gravitate towards you, leading to a wonderful social life of true friends - and an eventual, lifetime mate. The list below is from the website CHARACTER COUNTS.


Be honest • Don’t deceive, cheat or steal • Be reliable — do what you say you’ll do • Have the courage to do the right thing • Build a good reputation • Be loyal — stand by your family, friends and country


Treat others with respect; follow the Golden Rule • Be tolerant of differences • Use good manners, not bad language • Be considerate of the feelings of others • Don’t threaten, hit or hurt anyone • Deal peacefully with anger, insults and disagreements


Do what you are supposed to do • Persevere: keep on trying! • Always do your best • Use self-control • Be self-disciplined • Think before you act — consider the consequences • Be accountable for your choices


Play by the rules • Take turns and share • Be open-minded; listen to others • Don’t take advantage of others • Don’t blame others carelessly


Be kind • Be compassionate and show you care • Express gratitude • Forgive others • Help people in need


Do your share to make your school and community better • Cooperate • Get involved in community affairs • Stay informed; vote • Be a good neighbor • Obey laws and rules • Respect authority • Protect the environment



Today's young adults are faced with many issues that will directly affect your success and happiness in life. Below are some helpful links that will help you identify and deal with these issues.

Please note that the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) listed below under Links of Wisdom is also quite helpful in dealing with these issues.

Addictions - Many people go through life with an "inner emptiness" or "inner pain". Rather than dealing with the issue directly, they turn to "addictions".

Addictions come in all types of behaviors. They include smoking, alcohol, drugs, sex and a host of other destructive habits.

By recognizing these behaviors in advance, you will be able to avoid a life that does not require these temporary "fixes". These fixes only bring temporary happiness and eventually much pain to yourself and those who love you.

If you have an addiction problem - get help locally - through your parents, school or church - or online through these websites.

Smoking is probably the hardest addiction to break. But break it you must or you'll pay the price in serious health issues later on.

Drugs are also highly detrimental to your health. "Just Say No!" might sound outdated, but it is totally appropriate.

Sex issues are becoming more prevalent at an increasingly younger age. Click here for an index of well researched articles on sex and relationships - and the surprising origin of today's sexual behaviors.  Also check out God's viewpoint regarding sex.

Teen Hotline    1-877-968-8454   1-310-855-4673

Susie Vanderlip's Legacy of Hope Program



Never before in history have there been so many resources to draw on to improve oneself. Below are some of the better sources for becoming a more successful, well balanced, happy and informed person. Most of this information will not be found in our educational systems or churches.

Two Versions of The Secret

Please note that there are two versions of The Secret movie listed below. The first version featured the works of Abraham-Hicks. That portion of the movie was omitted in the final, extended version that most will either view online and/or purchase. The work of Abraham-Hicks is generally not accepted by Christians because of it's basis on channeling, a  practice condemned in the Bible.

5 Ways to Use the Internet for Self-Improvement

10 Steps to Being Happier and Healthier

10 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Your Age

11 Forgotten Laws - Highly recommended.

20 Alternatives for Your Kids to Watching TV

50 Habits of Successful People

80/20 Rule

800 Numbers  - Hard to find listings.

Accomplish Great Things

Ace Your Exams

Al-Anon/Alateen - For drinking or drug problems of others.

The Art of Thinking - Good information even if you don't buy the package.

Attracting Abundance

The Best High School Valedictorian Speech

Beyond the Secret - New video. Buy it here.

Biblical Relationships

Blazers - Make all the difference in women getting noticed.

bob_proctor.jpg (22372 bytes)Bob Proctor - One of the leading Motivational Speakers and Success Coaches of our time.

Bob Proctor Audio Message

Bob Proctor Cruises - 2008 cruise is Oct 19.

Bob Proctor Interview

Bob Proctor Seminars

Bob Proctor Youth

Book of Life - Inspirational Power Point presentation.

British vs American English

Can Anyone  Make $25K a Month?

Character Counts

Churches Network for Non-Violence - Non-violent Christian parenting.

College Attendance

College Degree? 1

College Degree? 2 - A waste of time?

College Degree? 3 - A waste of money?

College Degree? 4 - A hoax or a financial disaster?

College Degree 5 - Dangerous campuses.

College Degree 6 - How the universities betray students.

College Degree 7 - Seven reasons not to send your kids to college.

College Degree 8 - Student debt for life?

College Degree 9 - Get paid to not go to college.

College Degree 10 - Debt for life.

College Degree 11 - One example of an alternative.

College Degree 12 - The more educated you are, the less you understand.

Communication Secrets


Converting the Brainwashed

Core Values


The Dash Movie - Inspirational.

Dating Advice - Don't ask, do tell. By Rabbi Daniel Lapin.

Dating...End of Courtship - Why we are not happy.

Dating Culture

Domestic Management

Dreams 1

Dreams 2

Dreams 3

Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Dr. Phil McGraw

Dr. Toni Grant

Dress - How teen gals should dress.

Education - Illuminati control of all courses.

EFT for Success

Female Advice


Financial Success with EFT

Foundations Magazine

411 - Free Directory Assistance

Gender Differences Videos

 Geny Mill - I want to help Generation Y Millennials.

Goal 33 - For youth.



How to Find A Good Wife or Husband

How to Find What You Love to Do

The Incredibly Depressing Answers College Students Gave When Asked What the Holocaust Was and Where it Began

Insight of the Day

International Calls for Free

Internet Dating


Inspirational & Motivational PowerPoint Slide Shows

It's Not About the Money - Why people never become wealthy.

Job Tips You Didn't Get in College

The Law of Attraction - The website for "The Secret" movie.

Lean Teen Self Esteem - Weight loss for teens.

Legacy of Hope - Susie Vanderlip's program of making healthy choices. Watch her video above.

susie vanderlip.jpg (37885 bytes)Legacy of Hope - Blogspot

Legacy of Hope -

Life is Simple, Hard but Simple - Free PDF download.

Lost Generation - Excellent video for young people.

Love Lies

Marriage Spring Cleaning

Machiavelli Personality Test

Master Key System

Messages for Your Children

The Millionaire Mindset - Free book courtesy of Bob Proctor.


Money and Markets

Money Download - By Bob Proctor, biblically based success coach.

Moral Character

Motivation Speakers

Multiple Sources of Income


Optical Illusion

The Opus - The movie.


Perfect Reason to Feel Grateful for What You Have

Personals for Raw Food Fans

Photo Reading - Read 25,000 words per minute.

Physical Attraction

Positive Thinking

The Power of Mentorship - Free book.

The Power of Mentorship - The Movie.

Quality Films Do Exist

Quantum Lifeskills

Rags to Riches - How the world's billionaires made it.

Relationships 1

Relationships 2

Relationships 3 - Why you should get married.

Respectful Kids


School Dances

Science of Getting Rich Free Lessons - Sign up for 7 free lessons.

The Secret DVD - Purchase it here. The DVD has much more information than the online video, including a lengthy interview with the producer. You'll also want to share this DVD with others.

The Secret Movie - Watch it online from the official website.

The Secret Movie - The first 20 minutes.

The Secret Video - Brief excerpts from the movie, "The Secret".

Secrets of Happiness 

secret.jpg (7483 bytes)Secrets to Living Longer and Happier


Self Esteem Through EFT

Self-Improvement Videos

Sense of Humor

Sex 1 - A host of well researched articles on sex and relationships - and the surprising origin of today's sexual behaviors.

Sex 2 - God's viewpoint regarding sex.

Sex 3 - Promoted by the Illuminati

Sexual Chemistry

Solution to All Problems

Spanking Controversy - By Samuel Martin.

Star In Us Group - One new millionaire every 5 days!

Student Success


Success for Dummies

Talk Less Listen More

Talk Less Listen More - The free book download.


Teen Hotline - 1-877-968-8454 or 1-310-855-4673. - Interesting speakers on all subjects.

Think and Grow Rich - Timeless classic on improving your life.

Think and Grow Rich - Free PDF download of the book.


Time Gets Better with Age

The Ultimate Success Secret - Free book download.

Values Teaching

Vision Board Video

What the Bleep Do We Know?

What the Bleep Study Guide

What the Bleep Do We Know? - The movie. Makes you think about how we perceive things.

What the Bleep Do We Know & EFT

What to Do With the Rest of Your Life - Excellent video.

Word of the Day 1

Word of the Day 2

Working With The Law

The World as a Village

You Were Born Rich

Recommended Books for


Click on each book below and

the one above for more information.

Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives

Ten Stupid Things Men Do to Mess Up Their Lives

The Secret - The First 20 Minutes

Napoleon Hill on Andrew Carnegie's 
'Power to Direct Your Mind And Manifest Your Destiny' 

21 Tips for Success

From the many emails received daily, one has stood out that will benefit TODAY'S YOUNG ADULTS. It is one of those "how-to-be-successful-in-life" emails:

  1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

  2. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their
    conversational skills will be as important as any other.

  3. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

  4. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

  5. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

  6. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

  7. Believe in love at first sight.

  8. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

  9. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

  10. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name-calling.

  11. Don't judge people by their relatives.

  12. Talk slowly, but think quickly.

  13. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

  14. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

  15. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

  16. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

  17. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

  18. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

  19. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

  20. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

  21. Spend some time alone.


  1. Take into account that great love and great achievements
    involve great risk.

  2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

  3. Follow the three R’s:
    Respect for self,
    Respect for others and
    Responsibility for all your actions.

  4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a
    wonderful stroke of luck.

  5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

  6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great relationship.

  7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate
    steps to correct it.

  8. Spend some time alone every day.

  9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.

  10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

  11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and
    think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.

  12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for
    your life.

  13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the
    current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

  14. Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.

  15. Be gentle with the earth.

  16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.

  17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your
    love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

  18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order
    to get it.

  19. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

100 Quotes from the Movie, "THE SECRET"


1. We all work with one infinite power.

2. The Secret is the Law of Attraction (LOA).

3. Whatever is going on in your mind is what you are attracting.

4. We are like magnets - like attract like. You become AND attract what you think.

5. Every thought has a frequency. Thoughts send out a magnetic energy.

6. People think about what they don't want and attract more of the same.

7. Thought = creation. If these thoughts are attached to powerful emotions (good or bad) that speeds the creation.

8. You attract your dominant thoughts.

9. Those who speak most of illness have illness, those who speak most of prosperity have it..etc..

10. It's not "wishful" thinking.

11. You can't have a universe without the mind entering into it.

12. Choose your thoughts carefully .. you are a masterpiece of your life.

13. It's OK that thoughts don't manifest into reality immediately (if we saw a picture of an elephant and it instantly appeared, that would be too soon).

14. EVERYTHING in your life you have attracted .. accept that fact it's true.

15. Your thoughts cause your feelings.

16. We don't need to complicate all the "reasons" behind our emotions. It's much simpler than that. Two categories .. good feelings, bad feelings.

17. Thoughts that bring about good feelings mean you are on the right track. thoughts that bring about bad feelings means you are not on the right track.

18. Whatever it is you are feeling is a perfect reflection of what is in the process of becoming.

19. You get exactly what you are FEELING.

20. Happy feelings will attract more happy circumstances.

21. You can begin feeling whatever you want (even if it's not there).. the universe will correspond to the nature of your song.

22. What you focus on with your thought and feeling is what you attract into your experience.

23. What you think and what you feel and what actually manifests is ALWAYS a match - no exception.

24. Shift your awareness.

25. "You create your own universe as you go along" Winston Churchill.

26. It's important to feel good ( ( ( (((good))) ) ) ).

27. You can change your emotion immediately by thinking of something joyful, or singing a song, or remembering a happy experience.

28. When you get the hang of this, before you know it you will KNOW you are the creator.

29. Life can and should be phenomenal .. and it will be when you consciously apply the Law of Attraction.

30. Universe will re-arrange itself accordingly.

31. Start by using this sentence for all of your wants: "I'm so happy and grateful now that.... ".

32. You don't need to know HOW the universe is going to rearrange itself.

33. LOA is simply figuring out for yourself what will generate the positive feelings of having it NOW.

34. You might get an inspired thought or idea to help you move towards what you want faster.

35. The universe likes SPEED. Don't delay, don't second-guess, don't doubt..

36. When the opportunity or impulse is there ... ACT.

37. You will attract everything you require - money, people, connections.. PAY ATTENTION to what's being set in front of you.

38. You can start with nothing ... and out of nothing or no way - a WAY will be provided.

39. HOW LONG??? No rules on time .. the more aligned you are with positive feelings the quicker things happen.

40. Size is nothing to the universe (unlimited abundance if that's what you wish) We make the rules on size and time.

41. No rules according to the universe .. you provide the feelings of having it now and the universe will respond.

42. Most people offer the majority of their thought in response to what they are observing (bills in the mail, being late, having bad luck...etc.).

43. You have to find a different approach to what is through a different vantage point.

44. "All that we are is a result of what we have thought" - Buddha.

45. What can you do right now to turn your life around?? Gratitude.

46. Gratitude will bring more into our lives immediately.

47. What we think about and THANK about is what we bring about.

48. What are the things you are grateful for?? Feel the gratitude... focus on what you have right now that you are grateful for.

49. Play the picture in your mind - focus on the end result.

50. VISUALIZE!!! Rehearse your future.

51. VISUALIZE!!! See it, feel it! This is where action begins.

52. Feel the joy .. feel the happiness :o)

53. An affirmative thought is 100 times more powerful than a negative one.

54. "What this power is, I cannot say. All I know is that it exists." Alexander Graham Bell.

55. Our job is not to worry about the "How". The "How" will show up out of the commitment and belief in the "what".

56. The Hows are the domain of the universe. It always knows the quickest, fastest, most harmonious way between you and your dream.

57. If you turn it over to the universe, you will be surprised and dazzled by what is delivered ... this is where magic and miracles happen.

58. Turn it over to the universe daily... but it should never be a chore.

59. Feel exhilarated by the whole process ... high, happy, in tune.

60. The only difference between people who are really living this way is they have habituated ways of being.

61. They remember to do it all the time.

62. Create a Vision Board .. pictures of what you want to attract .. every day look at it and get into the feeling state of already having acquired these wants.

63. "Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions." Albert Einstein.

64. Decide what you want ... believe you can have it, believe you deserve it, believe it's possible for you.

65. Close your eyes and visualize having what you already want - and
the feeling of having it already.

66. Focus on being grateful for what you have already ... enjoy it!! Then release into the universe. The universe will manifest it.

67. "Whatever the mind of man can conceive, it can achieve" W. Clement Stone.

68. Set a goal so big that if you achieved it, it would blow your mind.

69. When you have an inspired thought, you must trust it and act on it.

70. How can you become more prosperous?? INTEND IT!!

71. 'Checks are coming in the mail regularly'... or change your bank statement to whatever balance you want in there... and get behind the feeling of having it.

72. Life is meant to be abundant in ALL areas...

73. Go for the sense of inner joy and peace then all outside things appear.

74. We are the creators of our universe.

75. Relationships: Treat yourself the way you want to be treated by others .. love yourself and you will be loved.

76. Healthy respect for yourself.

77. For those you work with or interact with regularly .. get a notebook and write down positive aspects of each of those people.

78. Write down the things you like most about them (don't expect change from them). Law of attraction will not put you in the same space together if you frequencies don't match.

79. When you realize your potential to feel good, you will ask no one to be different in order for you to feel good.

80. You will free yourself from the cumbersome impossibilities of needing to control the world, your friends, your mate, your children...

81. You are the only one that creates your reality.

82. No one else can think or feel for you ... its YOU ... ONLY YOU.

83. Health: thank the universe for your own healing. Laugh, stress free happiness will keep you healthy.

84. Immune system will heal itself.

85. Parts of our bodies are replaced every day, every week... etc... Within a few years we have a brand new body.

86. See yourself living in a new body. Hopeful = recovery. Happy = happier biochemistry. Stress degrades the body.

87. Remove stress from the body and the body regenerates itself. You can heal yourself.

88. Learn to become still ... and take your attention away from what you don't want, and place your attention on what you wish to experience.

89. When the voice and vision on the inside become more profound and clear than the opinions on the outside, then you have mastered your life.

90. You are not here to try to get the world to be just as you want it. You are here to create the world around you that you choose.

91. And allow the world as others choose to see it, exist as well.

92. People think that if everyone knows the power of the LOA there won't be enough to go around ... This is a lie that's been ingrained in us and makes so many greedy.

93. The truth is there is more than enough love, creative ideas, power, joy, happiness to go around.

94. All of this abundance begins to shine through a mind that is aware of it's own infinite nature. There's enough for everyone. See it. Believe it. It will show up for you.

95. So let the variety of your reality thrill you as you choose all the things you want.. get behind the good feelings of all your wants.

96. Write your script. When you see things you don't want, don't think about them, write about them, talk about them, push against them, or join groups that focus on the don't wants... remove your attention from don't wants.. and place them on do wants.

97. We are mass energy. Everything is energy. EVERYTHING.

98. Don't define yourself by your body ... it's the infinite being that's connected to everything in the universe.

99. One energy field. Our bodies have distracted us from our energy. We are the infinite field of unfolding possibilities. The creative force.

100. Are your thoughts worthy of you? If not - NOW is the time to change them. You can begin right where you are right now. Nothing matters but this moment and what you are focusing your attention on.

From Alternative Therapies and Health News

Top 10 Ways To Be Happy

happy gals.jpg (15193 bytes)If you have 10 reasons to be sad and depressed, there are 100 reasons to be happy. It all depends on the way you handle stress and problems. If you really want to be happy, you first need to make a conscious decision that you are going to be happy no matter what. There are numerous benefits of being happy - you will be more healthier and have a positive outlook towards life.

Here are some ways to bring back the happiness in your life:

1. Stop trying to be perfect. Don’t expect perfection from yourself or from anybody. You don’t need to impress people around you and you don’t have to get everything done perfectly.

“Nobody in this world is perfect. I am Nobody”

2. Be happy and satisfied with what you have. Stop comparing with others at every stage, this will in fact add to your misery. Be happy and content with your life. Remove the feelings of jealousy and enmity.

3. Schedule some time for yourself. Give yourself one hour each day when you can truly relax and enjoy yourself. Do some exercise, work on a hobby, go for a walk, or read a book. Pamper your self with some massages or beauty therapies. Meditate or pray to God. This will renew your energy and concentration.

4. If you are too stressed at work, take a break and refresh your energy. Go for a holiday with your family and friends. Explore new places. Taking breaks helps your body recover the lost energy. You may take short or long breaks, depending on your work and stress levels. When you get back to work after a break, your concentration and focus improves a great deal and you are more motivated.

5. Don’t be alone all the time. Go out with your friends and talk to them on the phone regularly. Watch a movie, go shopping or do things that you always loved but did not get the time because of your busy schedules. Call your friends home and watch a funny movie together.

6. If you are a working parent, take a break from work and spend time with your kids. Or play with your pets. Visit your relatives and throw a party for them. Dance and sing with them.

7. Be grateful to people around you. Be thankful for even small favors and blessings.

8. Help Others. It has been observed that helping others gives you immense satisfaction and happiness. Make someone’s life more beautiful by contributing in your own small way.

9. Re-assess your priorities. Spend time with your family and pray to God. Stay in the present. Do not waste time regretting your past or worrying about the future.

10. Laugh out loud at least once in a day and keep smiling. Focus on things that keep you happy instead of those that keep you down. Forget your worries and pains, everybody in this world, has some problems. But it all depends on the way you deal with it.

From Psychology Today

The Secrets of Happiness

Provided by: Psychology Today

Last Updated: 07/01/92

Forget about money. Don't fret about youth. Acting happy is likely to make you happy.

There are happy people. Researchers at the National Institute on Aging found that well-being is strongly influenced by enduring characteristics of the individual. In a 10-year study, they found that, regardless of whether their marital status, job, or residence had changed, people with a happy disposition in 1973 were still happy in 1983. There's good news in these findings: Given the right disposition, in the face of difficulty, people can still find renewed happiness.

What makes for a happy disposition? Who are these people who stay basically up despite life's downs? There are four important traits of happy people:

I: Self-esteem: Happy People Like Themselves

During the 1980s, no topic in psychology was more researched than the self. Many reports showed the dividends of high self-esteem--in some University of Michigan studies of well-being in America, the best predictor of general life satisfaction was not satisfaction with family life, friendships, or income, but satisfaction with self. People who like and accept themselves feel good about life in general.

This will come as no surprise to anyone attuned to the pop psychology of our age. Self-help books exhort us to respect ourselves, to dwell on our good points, to be positive. Cut the self-pity. Stop the negative talk. To discover love, first love yourself. We've heard the message: In a 1989 Gallup poll, 85 percent of Americans rated "having a good self-image or self-respect" as very important; 0 percent rated it unimportant.

Actually, most of us have a good reputation with ourselves. In studies of self-esteem, even low-scoring people respond in the mid-range of scores. (A "low" self-esteem person responds to statements such as "I have good ideas" with a qualifying adjective such as "somewhat" or "sometimes.")

Moreover, one of the most provocative yet firmly established conclusions of social psychology concerns the potency of "self-serving bias." People accept more responsibility for good deeds than for bad, for successes than for failures. The question "What have I done to deserve this?" is one we ask of our troubles, not our successes--those we assume we deserve.

On nearly any subjective or socially desirable dimension, most people actually see themselves as better than average. We also remember and justify our past actions in self-enhancing ways, are quicker to believe more flattering descriptions of ourselves than unflattering ones, and overestimate the extent to which others support our opinions and share our foibles. For most of us, these "positive illusions" protect against anxiety and depression. All of us at some time do feel inferior--especially when comparing ourselves with those who are a step or two higher on the ladder of status, looks, or income. The deeper and more frequently we have such feelings, the more unhappy we are. Therefore, we function better with modest self-enhancing illusions.

A healthy self-esteem, then, is both positive and realistic. Because it is based on the genuine achievement of realistic ideals, and on feeling accepted for what one is, such self-esteem provides a strong foundation for enduring joy.

II: Optimism: Happy People Are Hope-Filled

Those who agree that "with enough faith, you can do almost anything" and that "when I undertake something new, I expect to succeed" may be a bit bubble-headed. But, for seeing the glass of life as half-full rather than half-empty, they are usually happier.

Optimists are also healthier. Several studies reveal that a pessimistic style of explaining bad events--saying, "It's my fault, it's going to last, and it's going to undermine everything"--makes us more vulnerable to illness. Harvard graduates who were most pessimistic when interviewed in 1946 were least healthy when restudied in 1980. Virginia Tech students who reacted to bad events pessimistically suffered more colds, sore throats, and flu a year later. In general, optimistic people are less bothered by various illnesses and recover better from cancer and surgery.

Optimists also enjoy greater success. Rather than see setbacks as signs of their incompetence, they view them as flukes or as suggesting the need for a new approach. A person who confronts life with an attitude that often says "Yes!" to people and possibilities lives with far more joy and venturesomeness than do habitual naysayers.

Yet in affirming the great truth about optimism, let us also remember a complementary truth about the perils of unrealism. Unrealistic optimists may fail to take sensible precautions. And consider the shame and dejection that accompanies shattered expectations. If you believe the inspirational messages of positive thinkers, then whose fault is it if you don't march upward from highs to higher highs? What do we conclude when our marriages turn out to be less than we romanticized, when we are less successful than we dreamed?

At such times, we have only ourselves to blame. When the dream collapses, the biggest dreamers often fall the hardest. Limitless optimism breeds endless frustrations.

The recipe for well-being, then, requires neither positive nor negative thinking alone, but a mix of ample optimism to provide hope, a dash of pessimism to prevent complacency, and enough realism to discriminate those things we can control from those we cannot.

III: Extroversion: Happy People Are Outgoing

In study after study, extroverts--social, outgoing people--report greater happiness and satisfaction with life. The explanation seems partly temperamental. "Extroverts are simply more cheerful and high-spirited," report National Institute of Aging researchers Paul Costa and Robert McCrae. Self-assured people who walk into a room full of strangers and warmly introduce themselves may also be more accepting of themselves. Liking themselves, they are confident that others will like them, too.

Such attitudes tend also to be self-fulfilling, leading extroverts to experience more positive events. When University of Illinois researchers Ed Diener and Keith Magnus studied students at the undergraduate level and then again four years later as alumni, they found that life had treated extroverts more kindly. Compared to introverts, extroverts were more likely to have gotten married, found good jobs, and made new, close friends.

Extroverted people are more involved with others. They have a larger circle of friends and they more often engage in rewarding social activities. They experience more affection and enjoy greater social support--an important wellspring of well-being.

IV: Personal Control: Happy People Believe They Choose Their Destinies

Summarizing the University of Michigan's nationwide surveys, researcher Angus Campbell commented that "having a strong sense of controlling one's life is a more dependable predictor of positive feelings of well-being than any of the objective conditions of life we have considered." And the 15 percent of Americans who feel in control of their lives and feel satisfied with themselves have "extraordinarily positive feelings of happiness."

Consider your own sense of personal control. Would you agree with the statement that "I don't have enough control over the direction my life is taking" or that "What happens to me is my own doing"? That "The world is run by a few powerful people" or that "The average person can influence government decisions"? Those whose responses to such statements reveal an "internal locus of control" typically achieve more in school, cope better with stress, and live more happily.

Increasing people's control can noticeably improve their health and morale as well. One study by Yale psychologist Judith Rodin encouraged nursing-home patients to exert more control--to make choices about their environment and to influence policy. As a result, 93 percent became more alert, active, and happy. Similar results have been observed after allowing prisoners to move chairs and control the lights and TV, and after enabling workers to participate in decision making.

Happy, too, are those who gain the sense of control that comes with effective management of one's time. Unoccupied time, especially for out-of-work people who aren't able to plan and fill their time, is unsatisfying. Sleeping late, hanging out, and watching TV leave an empty feeling. For happy people, time is "filled and planned; they are punctual and efficient," says Oxford University psychologist Michael Argyle. "For unhappy people, time is unfilled, open, and uncommitted; they postpone things and are inefficient."

Establishing pre-set deadlines for oneself--and then meeting them--can lead to the delicious, confident feeling of personal control.

Finally: How To Be Happy

It's easily enough said that happiness comes with having positive self-esteem, feeling in control of our lives, and having optimistic, outgoing dispositions, but how can we strengthen such traits? If we wish we were happier, can we somehow become more positive, inner-directed, confident, and extroverted? Just how malleable are we?

Well-meaning advice to "be more outgoing" or to "have a more cheerful outlook" can burden us with the responsibility to choose our basic temperament. More than such advice-givers realize, we bring our basic dispositions with us into the world.

More and more studies show that our basic personality traits endure, especially after childhood. While developmental psychologists are sometimes surprised by how often troubled, unhappy children mature into competent, successful adults, there is nonetheless an underlying consistency to personality. After the end of the teen years, traits such as outgoingness, emotional stability, openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness seem to persist throughout adulthood.

But it's also true that we have the power to affect our own destinies, for we are the creators as well as the creatures of our social worlds. We may be the products of our past, but we are also the architects of our future. Personality isn't programmed like eye color. The predispositions we bring with us into the world leave room for nurture's influence, and our own efforts as well. What we do today shapes our world and ourselves tomorrow.

If social psychologists have proven anything during the last 30 years, they have proven that the actions we take leave a residue inside us. Every time we act, we amplify the underlying idea or tendency behind it. Most people presume the reverse: that our traits and attitudes affect our behavior. While this is true to a certain extent (though less so than commonly supposed), it is also true that our traits and attitudes follow our behavior. We are as likely to act ourselves into a new way of thinking as to think ourselves into a new way of acting.

There is a practical moral here for us all. Do we wish to change ourselves in some important way? Perhaps boost our self-esteem? Become more optimistic and socially assertive? Well, a potent strategy is to get up and start doing that very thing. Don't worry that you don't feel like it. Fake it. Pretend self-esteem. Feign optimism. Simulate outgoingness.

In experiments, people have been asked to write essays or present themselves to an interviewer in either self-enhancing or self deprecating ways. Those who act as if they are exceptionally intelligent, caring, and sensitive people later express higher self-esteem when privately describing themselves to a different researcher. This saying-becomes-believing effect is harnessed by therapy techniques (such as behavior therapy, rational-emotive therapy, and cognitive therapy), each of which prods the clients into practicing more positive talk and behavior.

Yes, telling people to act or talk positively sounds like telling people to be phony. But, as usually happens when we step into some new role--perhaps our first days "playing" parent, salesperson, or teacher--an amazing thing happens: The phoniness gradually subsides. We notice that our uncomfortable sense of being a parent, for instance, no longer feels forced. The new role--and the new behaviors and accompanying attitudes--have begun to fit us as comfortably as an old pair of blue jeans.

The moral: Going through the motions can trigger the emotions. Surely you've noticed. You're in a testy mood, but when the phone rings you feign cheer while talking to a friend. Strangely, after hanging up, you no longer feel so grumpy. Such is the value of social occasions--they impel us to behave as if we were happy, which in fact helps free us from our unhappiness.

Granted, we can't expect ourselves to become more upbeat and socially confident overnight. But rather than limply resign ourselves to our current traits and emotions, we can stretch ourselves, step by step. Rather than waiting until we feel like making those calls or reaching out to that person, we can begin. If we are too anxious, modest, or indifferent, we can pretend, trusting that before long the pretense will diminish as our actions ignite a spark inside--the spark that will lead to happiness.

Parts of this article were excerpted from The Pursuit of Happiness: Who Is Happy--and Why, by David G. Myers, Ph.D., copyright C) 1992 by William Morrow and Company Inc.

Copyright © 1991-2006 Sussex Publishers. All rights reserved.

This was written by Regina Brett

The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written.  My odometer rolls over to 50 this week, so here's an update:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is      special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

by Joseph L. Fromm

I've learned....that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned....that when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned....that just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" makes my day.

I've learned....that I feel better about myself when I make others feel better about themselves.

I've learned....that having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned....that what we have done for ourselves alone dies with us. What we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.

I've learned.... that one sincere apology is worth more than all the roses money can buy.

I've learned....that being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned....that you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned....that I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned....that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned....that sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand. 

I've learned....that simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned....that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned....that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned....that money doesn't buy class.

I've learned....that it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned....that once a relationship is over, if you experienced more smiles than tears, then it wasn't a waste of time.

I've learned....that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned....never to humiliate another person. Always give him an honorable way to back down or out of something and still save face.

I've learned....that the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?

I've learned....that if you are still talking about what you did yesterday, you haven't done much today.

I've learned....that when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned....that the older I get, the smarter my parents become.

I've learned.... that love, not time, heals all wounds.

12 Ways to Improve Your Relationships and Your Life

by Carol Tuttle

1.  Choose to be happy rather than right in your relationships. This will prevent a lot of arguing!

2.  Repeat in your mind: "It doesn't matter" when you can't stop arguing

3.  Pay it forward. For every kind deed offered to you, do a kind deed for someone else.

4.  Write thank-you notes frequently. The energy of gratitude feeds happiness.

5.  Smile -- even if you don't feel like it. You eventually will!

6.  When you think a complimentary thought about someone -- tell them.

7.  Refrain from making judgments -- think something positive instead.

8.  Ask your angels to flow the energy of happiness to your loved ones.

9.  Hug someone -- tightly.

10. Ask your children to tuck you in bed and read you a story for a change.

11. Give some service to someone who is more needy than you.

12. Pray with your spouse and also with your family once a day.

The Power of Positive Thinking

Key Point: You are what you think. You feel what you want.

Why Think Positively?

All of our feelings, beliefs and knowledge are based on our internal thoughts, both conscious and subconscious. We are in control, whether we know it or not.

Aim high and do your best

We can be positive or negative, enthusiastic or dull, active or passive.

The biggest difference between people is their attitudes. For some, learning is enjoyable and exciting. For others, learning is a drudgery. For many, learning is just okay, something required on the road to a job.

"Most folks are about as happy as they
make up their minds to be."
Abraham Lincoln

Our present attitudes are habits, built from the feedback of parents, friends, society and self, that form our self-image and our world-image.

These attitudes are maintained by the inner conversations we constantly have with ourselves, both consciously and subconsciously.

The first step in changing our attitudes is to change our inner conversations.

What Should We Be Saying?

One approach is called the three C's: Commitment, Control and Challenge.

Make a positive commitment to yourself, to learning, work, family, friends, nature, and other worthwhile causes. Praise yourself and others. Dream of success. Be enthusiastic.

Keep your mind focused on important things. Set goals and priorities for what you think and do. Visualize to practice your actions. Develop a strategy for dealing with problems. Learn to relax. Enjoy successes. Be honest with yourself.

Be courageous. Change and improve each day. Do your best and don't look back. See learning and change as opportunities. Try new things. Consider several options. Meet new people. Ask lots of questions. Keep track of your mental and physical health. Be optimistic.

Studies show that people with these characteristics are winners in good times and survivors in hard times.

Research shows that,
"... people who begin consciously to modify their inner conversations and assumptions report an almost immediate improvement in their performance. Their energy increases and things seem to go better ..."

Commitment, control and challenge help build self-esteem and promote positive thinking. Here are some other suggestions.

7 Suggestions for Building Positive Attitudes

  • In every class, look for positive people to associate with.

  • In every lecture, look for one more interesting idea.

  • In every chapter, find one more concept important to you.

  • With every friend, explain a new idea you've just learned.

  • With every teacher, ask a question.

  • With yourself, keep a list of your goals, positive thoughts and actions.

  • Remember, you are what you think, you feel what you want.

John Wooden's All-Time Best One-Liners

There are no shortcuts.

Always be progressing.

Give it away to get it back.

If you wish to be heard, listen.

Laugh with others, never at them.

Never mistake activity for achievement.

Nothing is stronger than gentleness.

Persistence is stronger than failure.

There is no substitute for hard work.

We get stronger when we test ourselves.

Happiness begins where selfishness ends.

You are more influential than you think.

Failing to prepare is preparing to fail.

Discipline yourself and others won't need to.

Learn from the past, don't live in the past.

Fear no opponent but respect every opponent.

Hard work is the difference. Very hard work.

Take what's available and make the most of it.

You never fail if you know you did your best.

When you are through learning, you are through.

What is right is more important than who is right.

The time to make friends is before you need them.

The worthy opponent brings out the very best in you.

There is a price to be paid for achieving anything.

You can do more good by being good than any other way.

The difficult challenge provides the best opportunity.

Once the opportunity arises, its too late to prepare.

Greatness is being your best when your best is needed.

Being a role model is the most powerful form of educating.

The smallest good deed is better than the best intention.

Be more concerned with your character than your reputation.

Tell the truth, that way you don't have to remember a story.

Everybody has a suggestion, not everybody has a decision.

For every artificial peak you create, there is a valley.

Be interested in finding the best way, not in having your own way.

Time spent getting even would be better spent trying to get ahead.

Being average means you're as close to the bottom as you are to the top.

Ability can get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there.

You can't control what happens to you, but you can control how you react.

Much can be accomplished when no one is concerned about who gets the credit.

Spend too much time learning tricks of the trade and you may never learn the


The Secret

The Secret

For those of you who have seen the groundbreaking documentary, The Secret, you will recognize Bob Proctor as the first teacher to appear on the screen. At the start of the film, he emphatically and enthusiastically states, "The Secret is The Law of Attraction." If you were like me, your eyes were glued to the television screen from that moment on, as you soaked in every word that followed. Bob Proctor is one of a select few people who have thoroughly understood and successfully applied The Law of Attraction (explained in detail in the film, 'The Secret'), transforming his early life, consisting of no formal education and no business connections or experience, into the story of a self-made multi-millionaire who travels the globe teaching people how to re-condition and re-program themselves for ultimate success in every facet of their lives. In this interview, Bob Proctor explains in great detail, the fundamental false wiring that causes most people to not reach their personal and professional goals. He also explains the practical techniques that you can put into practice today, to begin to correct that original conditioning, and start to program yourself for abundance and success in any area of your life that you wish.

We discuss the phenomenon that is The Secret… how it was made, how the producer of The Secret, Rhonda Byrne, learned of Bob's work and pursued him for the film, as well as some behind the scenes tidbits.

Bob is extremely generous with his depth of explanation, as it is his desire to help others in the realm of personal development. Pointing out that we all need coaches and teachers to set us on the right path, he cites Earl Nightingale, a pioneer in the field of personal development, as his mentor: a man he holds in the highest esteem and refers to several times throughout our chat. At the age of 72, Bob Proctor is on fire and determined to share his message with as many people as he can reach, through his company, LifeSuccess Productions. Both Bob and I have a similar goal in that respect. I enjoy using my platform on to share, to inspire, to teach and to entertain as many people as I can reach. I requested this interview with Bob Proctor with the notion of sharing his remarkable insights with our readers. I hope it does just that! (Allison Kugel): I watched The Secret for the very first time this past December, and I was thoroughly mesmerized. I literally didn't blink, or move, or get up for water. It was at a time in my life when I was going through quite a bit and it really did put me on the path to correcting that. I first became aware of you through watching the documentary The Secret. How did the producers of The Secret become aware of you?

Bob Proctor: We have people in Australia. The guy who you see [in the movie] who talks about the parking space in the film, he carries our stuff in Australia and we work with him. They had heard of me and he gave them my cell phone number. It was really a rather strange situation, the way it all came together. He also gave Rhonda Byrne (producer of 'The Secret'), a copy of my book, You Were Born Rich. I wrote it years ago. The idea behind it is that everyone is born with deep reservoirs of talent and ability within them. In other words, that's their riches and it's a matter of developing that. He gave her a copy of the book. That's the only book, apparently, that she took on the plane with her when she flew over to America. She read it all the way over. When she got here to shoot this film, she wanted me in it. Her sister Glenda was traveling with her. They had a crew. Glenda phoned my cell phone but the message was very garbled; it wasn't easy to understand. I didn't delete it, but I didn't get it either. This went on for three of four weeks. I said [to the president of my company], Gina Hayden, "Gina, I think this woman's name is Glenda and I think this is the phone number. Would you please phone and see what this is about? It mentioned something, I think, about a film." They said that they really wanted me in this film but that the crew was going back to Australia next week. She said that they were shooting all weekend in Aspen, Colorado. Gina said, "Isn't that strange? Bob is doing a seminar this weekend in Aspen." And I hadn't been to Aspen for two or three years. So I ended up right next door to where they were shooting. I just went in and sat down and went to work. Did they shoot you all at one time, and they just cut it up?

Bob Proctor

Bob Proctor

Bob Proctor: Yes. The amazing part of this… no one had a script… no one! It was a little hotel room that they were shooting in. Of course there's camera equipment everywhere and lights, shadowing for lights and you had to watch or you'd trip over something in the room, it was so small. They asked a couple of questions and I would answer them as if they weren't questions; just stating things. I talked to them for a couple hours, just explaining everything about the mind, the world that we live in and our relationship with why things happen the way they do. That was it, and I left. She said, "You'll hear from us." That was in June [of 2005] and then the following February of 2006, I got a DVD of The Secret, by Fed Ex. I didn't even put it on right away. Finally, I said to my wife, "Let's see what this is." Well, I just about fell off the sofa, I couldn't believe it! Because you were so moved by it?

Bob Proctor: I really was! I've been in this business and studying this since 1961, and I worked for five years with Nightingale-Conant in Chicago. Nightingale-Conant is the leader in personal development programs and products. I spent 5 years with them in the sixties and early seventies when this industry was really just in its rompers, and I'd never seen anything like [The Secret]. It is without question, the best production, and it gets the idea across better than anything I've ever seen. Who coined the term "The Secret?"

Bob Proctor: They did. Well actually if you go back to 1959, Earl Nightingale made a recording, The Strangest Secret. He says it's strange that it's a secret, because it's so obvious. But he said it is virtually a secret, because so few people understand it. It's that we become what we think about.

(After our interview, Bob sent me a copy of Earl Nightingale's revolutionary audio recording, 'The Strangest Secret.' As I listened to this man speak on the mechanics of how we become what we think about, and the power of positive imagery and emotional conditioning, I was agape at the notion that Mr. Nightingale possessed the wherewithal to come to understand such progressive ideas, back in the 1950s. He was truly ahead of his time and most likely what many people would have labeled a radical thinker, much to their own detriment. Even in 1959, a million people did see its genius, making his the biggest selling spoken word audio recording of that time, and earning Mr. Nightingale a gold record.) Do we become what we think about as the result of… we think positive thoughts and then we feel happier and more confident, and people are attracted to that? As a result, we tend to make more positive friends, more positive colleagues…?

Bob Proctor: Well that's the philosophic side of it, but I believe there is a more scientific side of it. Right. That's what I was going to ask you… or is it literal, where there is actual science…?

Bob Proctor: It's literal. Come back for a moment to 1959, because I think it's an important part of this. Earl Nightingale made this record (The Strangest Secret) in 1959. I worked with them in the early seventies, when Columbia Records gave them a Gold Record for it, because it was the only record outside of the entertainment industry that sold over a million copies. The Strangest Secret, was that we become what we think about. Now that is the one point that all great philosophers, avatars, and leaders have agreed on. They've disagreed on virtually everything else, but on that one point, they're all in agreement. When you think… your brain, first of all, is an electronic switching station. You are not your brain, Allison. You have a brain. You're not Allison. Allison is your name. If I say, "Who are you?" you would say, "I'm Allison." But you're really not. That's your name. You may point to your body and say, "This is me." But that's really not true either. You probably have a car, a home, and clothes. These are all things you have, but it's not you. And you… when you think, you activate brain cells. Think of your car for a moment, and an image of your car will come on the screen of your mind. What color is your car? Silver.

Bob Proctor: What color is the interior? Black.

Bob Proctor on The Larry King Show

Bob Proctor on The Larry King Show

(Bob continues to ask me more questions which included inquiring about the colors of my front door and the refrigerator in my kitchen. I answer his questions, eagerly awaiting his explanation. I am becoming acutely aware of the pictures that are flashing, one by one, in my mind's eye. I begin to get an inkling of where he is going with this exercise.)

Bob Proctor: You see things in your mind, don't you? You had to see your car. When I said, "Think of your car," what I am doing is, I am activating vocal cords. I am setting up a vibration… it's actually a light message. Your hearing sense is picking it up. It's going firing down a nerve passageway and striking a group of cells in your brain. And when it hits those cells in your brain, they are activated and the picture that's in them flashes on the screen of your mind. We went from your car to your door to your refrigerator. We could go from your stove to your clothes closet to your bed. You see how the pictures keep jumping on the screen of your mind? That's what language is. Language activates cells of recognition in your brain. Every cell has a positive and a negative pole. What do you like most about your car? The drive.

Bob Proctor: What do you dislike most about it? It could have more traction in bad weather.

Bob Proctor: There you saw the positive and the negative side of your car. Well your car just is. Your car's not a positive or a negative. There are people that would like the fact that it skids around because they find that fun. You don't find it fun. So there's positive and negative pole in your brain, in those cells that are clumped together. It's a cluster of cells in your brain that have pictures of your car in it, and you can activate what's good and what's bad in it, can't you? Yes.

Bob Proctor: That's true with everything. That's true with the city you live in, the job you have, your relationships with the people you're related to; you can activate positive or negative poles in the cells. When you do, you set up a vibration in your body. If you hold your hand in front of you and look at it, it's a molecular structure. It's a mass of molecules at a very high speed of vibration. It looks solid, but the truth is, it's not. It's a mass of energy that's vibrating, and when you leave it, it's still going to vibrate. The body in a coffin is moving, if you looked at it through the proper microscope you would see that, or it would never change to dust. See, everything in the universe vibrates. Well your mind and body vibrate. Your mind is activity. Your brain is the physical manifestation if that activity, as the rest of your body is. But you have the ability to activate brain cells and set up a vibration. Now the vibration that you're in most of the time is going to dictate the kind of people that are attracted to you, and that you're attracted to. If you're an upbeat, positive, gregarious individual you're not going to want to be hanging out with people that are always depressed or introverted. That doesn't mean you're never around them, but you're not going to be attracted to them. We attract everything into our life, and that's how we attract it: according to the vibration we're in. If you were raised with the idea of poverty, you've probably got that idea fixed in your subconscious mind. You could work your butt off all your life and you're going to stay poor. Is that because you are sending vibrations out into the universe? In other words, is it literal? Are my vibrations literally connecting to other vibrations in the universe that are arranging the universe in that way?

Bob Proctor: Absolutely. But, you see, it has to do with awareness. What you have to do is raise your level of conscious awareness. As I am explaining some of these things, you're developing an awareness. You're becoming aware of something about Allison. How old are you? 32.

Bob Proctor, in The Secret

Bob Proctor in The Secret

Bob Proctor: Isn't it amazing that there are things about you that you don't even know, and you're 32 years old?! You're living in one of the most advanced countries in the world. How does that happen? Well because we're never taught these things. You go through school and learn nothing about this. You don't learn it at home. You see, everything in life is about awareness. We've always been able to have the Internet. We've just become aware of it. What we are doing is developing a greater awareness all the time, and as you develop a greater awareness, you start to see things that you couldn't see before. I'm interested in your particular background, because I read that you didn't have a formal education. You didn't continue High School. And you then met the gentleman whom you were referring to before (Earl Nightingale) which set you on this path. How did these events transpire in your life?

Bob Proctor: I was on the fire department in a suburb of Toronto. I probably thought I was going to stay there for the rest of my life. It was the best job I'd ever had. I had just worked in factories and bars and things like that, prior. There was a man I met, and he was a very upbeat guy and he was always helping people to do better than they were doing. It was his way of life. And he got me to read Napoleon Hill's book, Think and Grow Rich. I had never read a book up until that point, and I was 26. I read that, and it was like it set something on fire inside of me. I had no formal education. There were all kinds of words in it that I didn't even understand. I had become very friendly with dictionaries, and I would have to dig out a dictionary and find out, "What's this word mean, what's that word mean?" He said, "If you do exactly what this author says, you're life will start to change." What I really wanted was money. I was earning four thousand dollars a year at the time, but I owed six. So my life was constantly trying to figure out how to take care of this debt and that debt. Well as long as you're thinking "debt," you're going to stay in it, but I didn't understand any of that. I set a goal of having twenty-five thousand dollars, and I didn't believe it. He told me to write it on a card and to carry the card in my pocket and read it as often as possible; at least every morning and every night. I didn't even know anyone with twenty-five thousand dollars. But what it did, and it took me years to figure this out, it caused me to start to think of earning money. Prior to that, I was thinking about debt. There's your polar opposite. When I was thinking of earning money, I wasn't thinking of debt. Then when I starting to think about [money], I started to hear people talking about it. It shifted your focus.

Bob Proctor: It did. It created a new awareness. I became aware that there were people talking about and that there were people earning money, and there were people earning a lot of money. Someone said that there was good money cleaning floors. I said, "I'm not proud. I'll clean floors." I had lots of time off from the fire department, so I started to clean one office and then another and then another. Pretty soon, I was earning a few thousand [dollars] a month. I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. Well, one day I passed out on the street [from exhaustion]. If you're one of those people that believe that hard work and honesty alone will bring riches, perish the thought, because it's not true. Riches come in responding to definite demands, based upon the application of definite principals, and not by chance or luck. I thought it was hard work. I worked myself into exhaustion, and I passed out in the street. So then I got all dressed up and I got other people cleaning offices. Pretty soon I was cleaning offices in Toronto, Montreal, Boston, Cleveland, Atlanta, London… and my income went over one million dollars. I realized that the secret to earning a lot of money is to have multiple sources of income. You don't trade time for money. That's the worst way to earn money! And that's what the masses do. That's what school teaches. 96% of our population trade time for money. It's a fool's game, because it's got an inherent problem. It's called saturation. You run out of time. So I started to learn things about money that school doesn't teach you. The secret to earning a lot of money is to multiply your time but setting up multiple sources of income. In other words, shifting your awareness will inspire a new way of thinking…

Bob Proctor: Wayne Dyer puts it very well. He says, "When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at will change." And you also say in your seminars, that somebody once told you that in order to change your life, you need to change your life. Can you define that?

Bob Proctor, on The Ellen DeGeneres Show

Bob Proctor on The Ellen DeGeneres Show

Bob Proctor: In other words, when talking about changing your life, you're talking about your results. You're talking about your income, how you spend your days, and who you spend your days with. Well in order to do that you have to change inside: your way of thinking, your feelings and your actions. Why and how did you change?

Bob Proctor: I changed because I changed the paradigm. I changed my conditioning. It took me nine years to figure it out. You're conditioned to operate the way you operate. You have ideas fixed in your subconscious mind. They're both genetic and environmental. You look like your relatives because of genetic conditioning. The form of your body and the structure of your features, that's genetic conditioning. That's in your gene pool, and it goes back generations. Once you're born, it's environmental conditioning. If you were raised in a home in the suburbs of Beijing, you would not be speaking English right now. You'd speak fluent Chinese. You're a linguistic genius at birth. You will learn the language of the people you're surrounded by. You will learn according to their level of awareness. You can teach a baby to read before it can talk. Now since most people don't know that, they're not doing it. But some do know that, and they're doing it. So we are conditioned mentally. People who are living on welfare are generally fourth or fifth generation welfare recipients. That is programming in our subconscious mind. Programming is nothing but ideas, through repetition, become fixed in the subconscious and when you put them all together it's called a paradigm. What is the difference between just positive thinking, versus what you do, in getting yourself into a positive vibration?

Bob Proctor: If you go back into proverbs in the Christian Bible, Solomon said, "As a man thinketh in his heart." Not as a man thinketh, but as a man thinketh in his heart. The subconscious mind, the early Greeks referred to as "the heart." As a person thinketh in their subconscious mind, so are they. There's a beautiful word, it's called Praxis. Praxis is the integration of belief with behavior. There are certain things you'll say, "I believe that," and yet your behavior would indicate that you've never heard of it. Pay attention to people when they say, "I believe that," but they don't do it. Why? On a conscious level they believe something. They consciously and intellectually understand it, but their paradigm is programmed the opposite way. How does one turn an intellectual connection into an emotional connection?

Bob Proctor: Through the repetition of presenting it to your emotional mind. There's only two ways to change a paradigm: one is an emotional impact. That's something just hitting you so hard, that your life will never be the same again. It's usually of a negative nature, but since everything is positive and negative, it can be a positive thing. That's when you're really jarred. The other way is through repetition. It's through the presenting of ideas over and over again. I remember as a little kid in school, if I was late for school, the teacher would have me write a hundred times, "I'm late for school. I'm late for school." What she didn't understand was that she was programming me to be late for school (laughs). Anything that you write over and over again, repeatedly, becomes fixed in the subconscious mind. (Laughs) I never thought of it that way. What is your opinion regarding the concept of traditional therapy, where somebody goes week after week and they vent to a therapist about the troubles in their life?

Bob Proctor: I think it's a gross waste of time. I think the therapist doesn't understand what the hell they're doing, which is the probable reason that there's such a high degree of suicide amongst them. And they are reinforcing the negative. I say, let it go! Overpower it with the positive! That's what I did. I'm happy, healthy and wealthy. I'm almost 73 years old. I've got more energy than most people 23. I've been around the world in the last week! How many countries have you been to in the past week?

Bob Proctor: Oh, I don't know; quite a few. Tomorrow I've got to be in Orlando for a meeting, then I've got to go from there to Phoenix the next day for a meeting, then I've got to come back to New York to tape Nightline and then back to Toronto. I think nothing of this. I mean it's just in a day's work.

Bob Proctor

Bob Proctor

(My conversation with Bob Proctor digressed, briefly, to the topic of constant motion and the anxiety that it produces, especially as it pertains to flying as well as the lack of downtime. At this point he made a jewel of a statement that will stay with me throughout my life as I think it is very wise. After listing to some reasons why I become anxious at the thought of my schedule becoming too packed, he simply replied, "I don't think we need to slow down. I think we need to calm down." I don't know why I had never before made this distinction, but there certainly is a distinction to be made.)

Bob Proctor: I stay in a very relaxed state. I don't let things throw me off. I am not the plaything for what's going on outside of me. So it seems that this all goes back to the images that you are holding in your mind.

Bob Proctor: Absolutely! Why do you think stress is such an epidemic?

Bob Proctor: Ignorance. People don't know who they are, and they're getting uptight. That thing you're living in, you call a body, is so tense. The body is supposed to be relaxed. I remember, Branch Rickey, he ran the Brooklyn Dodgers before they went to Los Angeles. He said that he didn't care how fast a guy could run or how well he could hit a ball, or how well he could throw the ball, or how well he could catch. He said, "If he wasn't as loose as ashes," he didn't want him on the team. Any professional sports coach will tell you that the person's got to be relaxed. That's the way we're supposed to live. When you are loose, energy flows freely through you. You're just a channel for spirit to operate through. How can people use the principles of The Secret to become more centered and eliminate stress in their lives?

Bob Proctor: To understand the principles of The Secret, we have to go back and understand ourselves. We're the ones that set up what we attract. I believe we have to gain an understanding of how the mind functions. There's a Doctor Mike in Florida. Both he and his wife, Susan, are psychiatrists. John Mike said that I taught him more about the mind in one year, than he had learned in 4 years of medical school and 5 years of psychiatric training. Here is a medical professional, a psychiatrist, who openly admitted they didn't teach him what I taught him. School does not teach us about who we are. So here we are, going around, and we don't know ourselves. And yet, you can teach this to a little kid. If you can teach a child the English language, you can certainly teach them how the mind functions. I have taught this to teenagers and the teenagers get it so fast, it would make your head spin! But, you see, the teenagers are making up their minds. We've got to change our mind. How can we change our vibrations, to create a body that feels loose and unstressed?

Bob Proctor: You would gain an understanding of how the mind functions, and then you would start going through exercises to re-program your subconscious mind. As you re-program your subconscious mind, you will see evidence of it in your material world; in your relationships, in the health that you enjoy. Now, am I doing [this] perfectly? No, because I'm not [always] aware. The more aware I become, the better I'm going to do. Would you say that positive visualization is a fair term?

Bob Proctor: Visualization will do it if you are visualizing the same thing over and over, and you are emotionally letting yourself get involved with it. I teach people to become actors. There's a wonderful book called, The Art of Acting by Stella Adler. She was Marlon Brando's teacher. It's the transcripts of classes she conducted, and living is really acting. If we would see how actors operate, they take a script and they read it and re-read it and memorize the script. Then they internalize the script, and then they become the script. Well that's what we have to do. We have to write our own script. "How do I really want to live?" And then we've got to internalize it and become it. When you watch great acting, they're not acting. They're living the part. So then in our own lives, we need to play the part that we want to be…

Bob Proctor: Absolutely… intellectually, emotionally, and physically. But you know where the real big hang up comes in? We're worried about what somebody else thinks. When you were a little girl, your mother would say, "What would the neighbors think?!" Well I found out… they don't (laughs). (Laughs) Exactly! Everyone is too wrapped up in their own lives.

Bob Proctor: The Secret is a phenomenon! And it's a phenomenon because it resonates with the soul. I believe you are a soul. I don't think you have one. I think you are one. And the soul is forever seeking its awareness of its oneness with what I refer to as God. And the more aware you become of your oneness with this wonderful and infinite, creative power, the more it's going to be reflected in your results.

The Secret

The Secret The film, The Secret, kind of found me. Several friends had mentioned it to me on more than one occasion, and I remember promising one friend I was going to watch it, but I was just paying lip service to it. Then I was invited to a viewing party for The Secret and I didn't go because I was busy that particular night. And then I met someone who did a psychic reading for me and he looked at me and he said, "There is a movie that I want you to watch, because I think it will help you. It can help you to literally start to change your life in a matter of minutes." He gave me the website address for The Secret ( and sent me on my way. It was trippie. It kept showing up like a bad penny, until I finally sat down and watched it, and it really spoke to me. I'd never found anything like that before.

Bob Proctor: There's something in you that wants to grow. You're probably destined to do something really good; I mean really good work. This creative urge within you seeks expression with and through you, and this is almost like a key that opened that door. I know that's what it was with me, way back when I picked up that book. I have helped hundreds of thousands of people all over the world. I love it, and I'm going to do it until I die. This is a very complicated subject to teach, and I know very few people who know how to teach it. I don't know all the people on The Secret, so I don't know whether they can teach it or not. But I have been teaching this now for 38 years, and I've had some phenomenal teachers. The one thing I recognized when I saw it… Rhonda Byrne (producer of The Secret) has a genius. Her genius was in putting this together as she has. Her's is the creative mark that is on [The Secret]. Do you know what caused Rhonda Burn to research this subject and to pursue it? Has she ever told you her story of why she put The Secret together?

Bob Proctor: She was in a bad way. She was not winning. And she was given the book, The Science of Getting Rich. That book did something to her, like [the book] Think and Grow Rich did with me. We have a program that we teach, and we teach the science of getting rich, and there is a science to it. People knock earning money. You can do a lot of good with money! It's the medium of exchange that we use for other people's products and services. Money is only used for two things: one is to make you comfortable, and the more comfortable you are, the more creative you can be. And the other is to extend the service that you render, far beyond your own presence. But, she was moved by that book. And I think if you had asked her while she was [producing The Secret], she couldn't tell you why. She just knew that she had to do it. I just hope she's strong enough to stand up to the criticism that she's having fired at her. But I would imagine she is. The backlash seems very recent and it appeared to unfold after Oprah talked about The Secret…

Bob Proctor: The reaction is, people don't like being changed. We hear that people resist change. That's not true. People openly accept change when they decide to change. If I come along and said, "Allison, you have to do it this way," you'd probably react to that. You'd resist it. But if you decide to do it this way, then you adapt to it. Well, this is causing people to change and they're reacting. They don't like it. The truth is, this is waking people up in large numbers and it's not going to go away. You've heard the saying, "When you hear the truth, you'll know it." Well, there's a reason for that. It resonates with the soul. I saw that you were billed as 'A Philosopher' in the film…

Bob Proctor: That wasn't my call. I had to go look up what a philosopher is… Oh, because I was going to ask you that. How would you define a philosopher?

Bob Proctor: I don't call myself a philosopher, although, at times I guess I would be. It's a person that's searching for the truth through reason, rather than through scientific facts. You're searching through your own way of thinking, and you don't have to prove it to anybody. And you're sharing your views with people; usually sharing your thoughts. It's of an esoteric nature. It's funny because I was trying to figure it out. I know that when I was in college, you could take philosophy courses or major in it, and I thought, "Is it a job, or a career, or just a state of being?"

Bob Proctor: I think it's more of a mental state that you're in. There are people that just philosophize. They just talk about it and they never do anything. They never internalize the information. I am very high on internalizing it. I believe that learning is when you consciously entertain an idea, you get emotionally involved in that idea, you step out and act on the idea and you change the result. The feedback to your consciousness of the change in result… that's the learning experience.

(Bob points out to me the distinction in what he believes is the true learning process versus what school and traditional learning would have us believe. He describes the process of listening to and memorizing facts, followed by being tested on those facts by way of an exam, as a largely ineffective learning process, and one that most of us have become accustomed to.)

Bob Proctor

Bob Proctor

Bob Proctor: We're raised to live through our senses. We're raised to go by what we hear, see, smell, taste and touch. As little kids [we hear], "Will you look at what I'm showing you? Will you listen to what I'm telling you?" Then we go to school, and what do we get? We get a report card. The school sends home a piece of paper with information on it, and that's telling the parent, and telling the student what kind of a student they are. It's absurd! That tells everybody where the student's mind was at for a few minutes, maybe three weeks ago. But we're raised to let that piece of paper we call a report card, determine our self worth as a student. Then when we leave school, we are in the habit of doing this. We let the balance sheet, we let the sales sheet, and we let the x-ray tell us what's going on in our world. We're programmed to live from the outside in, but we're built to live from the inside out. One thing that I find a lot, and tell me if you agree, is that people who's true intention is to serve and to share something, oftentimes they reap huge financial benefits in the process.

Bob Proctor: Well, yeah. Money is a reward for service rendered. Money is an instrument. It's also a magnifier. Money will just make you more of what you already are. It's funny that you say that, because I'm working on an article entitled, "Money is a Magnifying Glass."

Bob Proctor: Rhonda Burn (producer of The Secret) was a nice person before she started to earn any money. I knew her when she had to borrow money to get the film out there. Well now that she's earning millions, I don't need to wonder what she's going to do. I know what she's going to do. She's going to do a lot of good with it.

Bob Proctor is one of the dynamic teachers from the phenomenal documentary, 'The Secret,' as well as a world renowned life coach and personal consultant. For more information on Bob Proctor, visit

Of Interest to Those Born After 1979 



TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!!

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes , we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.

As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank Kool-aid made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because,

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 cha nnels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computer! s, no Internet or chat rooms.......
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

If YOU are one of them? CONGRATULATIONS!

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good.
While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.

Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!

The quote of the month is by Jay Leno:
"With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?"

For those that prefer to think that God is not watching over us...go ahead and delete this.
For the rest of us...pass this on.

Become A Better Listener

The simplest approach to becoming a better listener…

Focus first on giving others your complete attention. Once you feel confident you've improved, begin becoming more consistent in adding a small gap of silence between what's said by someone else and your response. Finally, work more to minimize interruptions.

~ give complete attention

~ maintain eye contact and face the speaker
acknowledge key points with a nod, smile or brief comment ("I see," "I understand," "right," etc.)

~ dismiss distractions and acknowledge phones, email, instant messengers and other people following the current interaction

~confirm understanding by rephrasing pertinent discussion issues

Add a gap of silence

~ add a small gap of silence between what the speaker says and your response - just an extra beat or two… this will help you minimize any tendency to interrupt and may encourage others to open up and share more (giving you the opportunity to learn more)

Minimize Interruptions

~ wait for the person to pause fully before asking questions to clarify

~ if you absolutely have to interrupt, a quick "I'm sorry, but [explain the crisis/problem/situation]…" is polite

~ if you need to interrupt a conversation at work, say either "I'm sorry, I need this addressed…" (if you're the boss) or "I'm sorry, this interruption is unavoidable…" (if you're an employee)

~ in any situation, make absolutely sure that what you have to say is worth the interruption

Earl Nightingale

In his excellent book, On Becoming a Person, Dr. Carl Rogers spelled out some of the characteristics of the new, powerful person who is emerging in our culture today...and the vital, different set of values he both maintains and lives. "I stressed," he writes, "his hatred of phoniness, his opposition to all rigidly structured institutions, his desire for intimacy, closeness and community, his willingness to live by new and relatively moral and ethical standards, his searching quality, his openness to his own and others' feelings, his spontaneity, his activism and his determination to translate his ideals into reality. I am talking," he wrote, "about a relatively small number of people. But I believe that these people constitute the change agents of the future. When some part of a culture is decayed at the core, a small group with new views, new convictions, and a willingness to live in new ways, is a ferment that cannot be stopped."

Let's take a look at that new person emerging in our culture and see if you and I qualify.

First - his hatred of phoniness. Our new powerful person sees through facades and tinsel...outmoded and ridiculous customs and beliefs. Free of the tyranny of things and the opinions of others, he and his family...she and her in a kind of solid serenity where true values count; where the verities, things like truth and justice, the family and work, take on real meaning. It is in the avoidance of phoniness that real freedom may be found...and one can drop off the rat race with a great sigh of relief. There are no inner circles to which these people need apply for membership; they are the centers of their own circles.

This person is opposed to all rigidly structured, closed institutions. Such institutions are saying, by the fact that they are rigidly structured and closed, "We have the answers...we need look no further...this is it." The new, powerful person knows that at this early stage of our development, such thinking is infantile. We do not have all the answers...about anything. And just as the maturing person is in a stage of growth, of becoming - so is a vital institution. It uses what it has and what it knows as springboards into the future...and assiduously avoids becoming closed and rigidly structured. A good and viable institution, like a self-actualizing person, is always in a state of growth...of becoming.

He has a desire for intimacy...closeness and community, and a willingness to live by new and relatively moral and ethical standards. This person has a searching quality and an openness to his own and others' feelings. He is spontaneous, unafraid of what others will say of his enthusiasms and ideas...and is determined to translate his ideas and ideals into reality.

Of course these people must constitute a relatively small number of people...a true inner circle, the most important and influential club of human beings on earth. The qualifications for membership are tough: To meet them takes work, thought and study...a willingness to find oneself and be oneself. But the perquisites of membership are great indeed! One of them is freedom...another is joy.

Earl Nightingale

George Carlin's Views on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh , what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!


Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them."

Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

Enjoy the simple things.

Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge. (GOD will be there with you)

Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to the next state, even to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. (Make sure you tell GOD)

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.

And if you don't send this to at least 8 people - who cares? But do share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each day!!
(With GOD)  .........Amen!!

Working With The Law

Working The Law – the key fundamental section which will enable you to use these teachings right away and change your results from day one.

The Law of Thinking – one of the most important laws to understand and apply, this law is fundamental to success and many of the others depend on this law, with this law alone you have the power to change your world. You'll learn the true meaning of thought and thinking – how to direct your power of thought into constructive channels of expression.

The Law of Supply – this is where you'll learn the truth that there are no limits except the ones which we create ourselves, that you live in a world of abundance where you can have, do and be anything you truly desire.

The Law of Attraction – this takes you on from The Secret, and into the practical application of Desire, Expectation and Achievement. How to be happy and grateful for what you have, and also to continually grow – through constant expansion and fuller expression of your true potential.

The Law of Receiving – the first law of creation - you'll find out how this Law is paradoxically about giving, and how to start the process of receiving in your own life.

The Law of Increase – which can easily be seen as the Law of Praise, this is one area where you can create instant results, through two simple approaches, which Bob and Mary explain in detail with examples.

The Law of Compensation – understanding this law can be “The key to all the dreams you ever had” – where Bob and Mary teach you how to lift yourself out of the place you are, to the place where you rightfully belong, and at the same time show you how to avoid the three common traps that will undermine your application of this law.

The Law of Non-Resistance – how, by relaxing and understanding, you can return to your natural state of abundance. Obstacles disappear, and you will learn that the only true limits are the ones you set through your thinking.

The Law of Forgiveness – you learn the powerful lesson of how to shift your perception, which removes the block to your awareness of love, abundance and success. This powerful section shows you how important it is to be able to feel the vibration you are in, and also change it through your conscious choice.

The Law of Sacrifice – this often misunderstood law includes the process of harnessing our powers toward a desired end – the giving up of something of a lower nature to receive something of a higher nature – in response to perhaps the most important question you can ask yourself: what do you really want? It clarifies the notion of disciplined thinking – and how this is an essential aspect of your personality which needs cultivating – and shows you how to do that.

The Law of Obedience – the final and perhaps best way to conclude – understanding that to create true abundance and success, we must be obedient to the laws we have come to understand – for only through working in harmony with the laws, can our results match our desires and dreams.

Universal Laws

1. The Law of Divine Oneness:
The Law of Divine Oneness helps us to understand that we live in a world where everything is connected to everything else. Everything we do, say, think and believe affects others and the universe around us.

2. The Law of Vibration:
This Universal Law states that everything in the Universe moves, vibrates, and travels in circular patterns. The same principles of vibration in the physical world apply to our thoughts, feelings, desires, and wills in the Etheric world. Each sound, thing, and even thought has its own vibrational frequency, unique unto itself.

3. The Law of Action:
The Law of Action must be applied in order for us to manifest things on earth. Therefore, we must engage in actions that support our thoughts, dreams, emotions and words.

4. The Law of Correspondence:
This Universal Law states that the principles or laws of physics that explain the physical world – energy, Light, vibration, and motion – have their corresponding principles in the etheric or universe. “As above, so below.”

5. The Law of Cause and Effect:
This Universal Law states that nothing happens by chance or outside the Universal Laws. Every action has a reaction or consequence and we “reap what we have sown.”

6. The Law of Compensation:
This Universal Law is the Law of Cause and Effect applied to blessings and abundance that are provided for us. The visible effects of our deeds are given to us in gifts, money, inheritances, friendships, and blessings.

7. The Law of Attraction:
This Universal Law demonstrates how we create the things, events, and people that come into our lives. Our thoughts, feelings, words, and actions produce energies which, in turn, attract like energies. Negative energies attract negative energies and positive energies attract positive energies.

8. The Law of Perpetual Transmutation of Energy:
This Universal Law states that all persons have within them the power to change the conditions in their lives. Higher vibrations consume and transform lower ones; thus, each of us can change the energies in our lives by understanding the Universal Laws and applying the principles in such a way as to effect change.

9. The Law of Relativity:
This Universal Law states that each person will receive a series of problems (Tests of Initiation) for the purpose of strengthening the Light within. We must consider each of these tests to be a challenge and remain connected to our hearts when proceeding to solve the problems. This law also teaches us to compare our problems to others’ problems and put everything into its proper perspective. No matter how bad we perceive our situation to be, there is always someone who is in a worse position. It is all relative.

10. The Law of Polarity:
This Universal Law states that everything is on a continuum and has an opposite. We can suppress and transform undesirable thoughts by concentrating on the opposite pole. It is the law of mental vibrations.

11. The Law of Rhythm:
This Universal Law states that everything vibrates and moves to certain rhythms. These rhythms establish seasons, cycles, stages of development, and patterns. Each cycle reflects the regularity of God’s universe. Masters know how to rise above negative parts of a cycle by never getting too excited or allowing negative things to penetrate their consciousness.

12. The Law of Gender:
This Universal Law states that everything has its masculine (yang) and feminine (yin) principles, and that these are the basis for all creation. The spiritual Initiate must balance the masculine and feminine energies within herself or himself to become a Master and a true co-creator with God.

Live A Life That Matters

Ready or not, someday, it will all come to an end.

There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours, or days.

All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass on.

Your wealth, fame and temporal power, will shrivel to irrelevance.

It will not matter what you owned, or what you were owed.

Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies, will finally disappear...

So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and the "to-do" lists.

The wins and losses, that once seemed so important, will fade away.

It won't matter where you came from, or on what side of the tracks you lived.

It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant...

Even your gender and skin color, will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built.

What will matter is not what you got, but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success, but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice,
that enriched, empowered or encouraged others, to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence, but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a deep, lasting loss, when you're gone.

What will matter are not your memories, but the memories that live in those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters, doesn't happen by accident, nor a matter of circumstances, but of choice.

We all have that choice...

~ ~ Author - Michael Josephson

10 Things Authentic Leaders Do

What would your life look like if you had absolutely no fear? What kinds of things would you do if you lived from a frame of reference that your thoughts literally could form your world? How brightly would your light shine if you stepped out of the limitations that are keeping you small, and stretched yourself well past your comfort zone into the place that you know, deep within, you are meant to be? Authentic leadership is all about being the person you know in your heart you have always been destined to be. Authentic leadership does not come from your title or from the size of your paycheck. Instead, this form of leadership comes from your being and the person that you are.


Here are 10 things that authentic leaders do on a regular basis:


1. They speak their truth. In business today, we frequently 'swallow our truth'. We say things to please others and to look good in front of The Crowd. Authentic leaders are different. They consistently talk truth. They would never betray themselves by using words that are not aligned with who they are. This does not give anyone a license to say things that are hurtful to people. Speaking truth is simply about being clear, being honest, and being authentic.


2. They lead from the heart. Business is about people. Leadership is about people. The best leaders wear their hearts on their sleeves and are not afraid to show their vulnerability. They genuinely care about other people and spend their days developing the people around them. They are like the sun: the sun gives away all it has to the plants and the trees. But in return, the plants and the trees always grow toward the sun.


3. They have rich moral fiber. Who you are speaks far more loudly than anything you could ever say. Strength of character is true power -- and people can feel it a mile away. Authentic leaders work on their character. They walk their talk and are aligned with their core values. They are noble and good. And in doing so, people trust, respect, and listen to them.


4. They are courageous. It takes a lot of courage to go against the crowd. It takes a lot of courage to be a visionary. It takes a lot of inner strength to do what you think is right even though it may not be easy. We live in a world where so many people walk the path of least resistance. Authentic leadership is all about taking the road less traveled and doing, not what is easy, but what is right.


5. They build teams and create communities. One of the primary things that people are looking for in their work experience is a sense of community. In the old days, we got our community from where we lived. We would have block parties and street picnics. In the new age of work, employees seek their sense of community and connection from the workplace. Authentic leaders create workplaces that foster human linkages and lasting friendships.


6. They deepen themselves. The job of the leader is to go deep. Authentic leaders know themselves intimately. They nurture a strong self-relationship. They know their weaknesses and play to their strengths. And they always spend a lot of time transcending their fears.


7. They are dreamers. Einstein said that "Imagination is more important than knowledge." It is from our imaginations that great things are born. Authentic leaders dare to dream impossible dreams. They see what everyone else sees and then dream up new possibilities. They spend a lot of time with their eyes closed creating blueprints and fantasies that lead to better products, better services, better workplaces, and deeper value. How often do you close your eyes and dream?


8. They care for themselves. Taking care of your physical dimension is a sign of self-respect. You can't do great things at work if you don't feel good. Authentic leaders eat well, exercise, and care for the temples that are their bodies. They spend time in nature, drink plenty of water, and get regular massages so that, physically, they are operating at planet-class levels of performance.


9. They commit to excellence rather than perfection. No human being is perfect. Every single one of us is a work in progress. Authentic leaders commit themselves to excellence in everything that they do. They are constantly pushing the envelope and raising their standards. They do not seek perfection and have the wisdom to know the difference. What would your life look like if you raised your standards well beyond what anyone could ever imagine of you?


10. They leave a legacy. To live in the hearts of the people around you is to never die. Success is wonderful, but significance is even better. You were made to contribute and to leave a mark on the people around you. In failing to live from this frame of reference, you betray yourself. Authentic leaders are constantly building their legacies by adding deep value to everyone that they deal with and leaving the world a better place in the process.


The smartest way to succeed in life is to learn from those who have gone before you. A truly successful life encompasses a healthy mind, body and spirit. 

The links below will help you to better understand and cope with the world we live in and achieve success and happiness.

Young adults have a much better chance of being killed or injured in a car accident than they do fighting on the battlefield of Iraq. Especially males (2/3 of all deaths). Yet, no one addresses this issue. The problem is more than just education and experience. It's 90% attitude. Young people have to realize that they are NOT invincible. Some very well written links from AUTOWEEK are listed below and are recommended reading for both parents and Young Adults alike.

Back to School Death at the Wheel

ADHD & Driving | Driver Ed vs Driver's Edge

Mike Adams is known internationally as the "Health Ranger" and has a fascinating and inspiring story to tell. Mike came from being a young man with many different medical problems to the model of good health and fitness. Mike is living proof you can make changes for the better. Read his incredible story here.

Mike also publishes, and a number of other very interesting websites on health, energy and technology.

Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is the most effective method of dealing with emotional problems, fears, phobias, addictions and even physical problems. You can learn to treat yourself or seek the counsel of a Certified EFT Practitioner

EFT - The official EFT website.

EFT Explanation - EFT explained.

EFT Manual - A free download.

EFT Practitioners - Find help in your area.

ASK was founded in 1976 by the late Dr. Ernest L. Martin. ASK (the ASSOCIATES for SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE) provides unbiased, nonsectarian, biblically based information to the public. There is no other place on the Internet or in any school or church where you will find this very special information. Some key articles are linked on the left-hand side of this web page.

ASSOCIATES ONLINE Statement of Beliefs - Who we are and what we believe.

Matthew 25 - What you can do to help others - and why you should do it.

"You are destined to change the world for good." - ELM